Realization And Acceptance

A month ago, as my sister and I wandered along one of many graffiti, boutique and café-filled side-streets in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, we happened upon a work by stencil artist B.D. White:

I emailed him to ask whether "all the beautiful things I wish I could show you" is part of a larger poem or song, or something of his own, and am still left to wonder. However, I realized as I stood there that this simple quote sums up one of my most inherent desires-- to share the beauty of this life with my fellow beings.

There have been many moments in my journey where this desire has caused pain. I remember a high school chemistry class where I told my mom's story about being related to Davy Crockett, and a classmate laughed and said "That's real? We all just thought that was one of Heather's stories!" My frustration in these moments has stemmed from a feeling of shame-- that telling stories, giving gifts, sharing photographs, etc. is somehow a nuisance or frivolity, stemming from narcissism or a desperate need for acceptance.

I had time last weekend while driving through the New Mexico desert...

...to think through this phenomenon and it's causes and effects, and have come to this conclusion: there is so much to love about the design of the universe, so much perfection in everything from the construction of a feather to the sound of dripping water, so much eccentric uniqueness in every spirit- how could I not want to share as much as possible about the things I experience with those around me who are living the same moments in time (and beyond), and drink up as many of their experiences as possible in return? There is so much we can all learn from one another, our elements and surroundings! I hope to instill the same curiosity, appreciation and love in my own daughters.

Ultimately in our digital world however I'm realizing that one of the key issues is timing. We are living in an era of passive sharing-- a phone call is rude, a text is borderline. In calling or texting we are now demanding immediate attention and response. Emailing is a little more acceptable, as we are sending a message that we know will be read as time allows, unless we are in a work setting. The most polite form of communication now seems to be the pre-arranged, in-person visit (difficult for world-travelling single mother marketing directors like me with little time and far-flung friends), the old-fashioned letter, which is personalized and private, but consumable at the leisure of the recipient without an immediate plea for response, or, (tragically?) this type of social media, which is passive, un-personalized, and meant for only those who choose to engage with it.

Therefore dears, I will write and visit those of you I know, politely share away here in hopes that other like-minded spirits will giddily glean something meaningful from these pages in free moments, and follow others with similar desires. Thank you for visiting!

 

Footnote wonder of the moment, the hummingbird moth (this pic from Santa Fe- it's beating wings felt like a soft breath on my hand):